Ode to Public Transportation

ODE TO PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION

Oh Public Transportation
How you fill my heart with fear
As I'm forced to sit in the back
By the drunken hobo vomiting beer

Lord knows its bad enough
He might be carrying STDs
But please, oh mighty God
Don't let him look this way and sneeze

He's probably part of the reason
The back smells oddly like piss
Oh shit, he's leaning on me.
THE BASTARD WANTS A KISS?

I leap ahead to the middle
Seeking refuge from the bum
But now there's something holding me.
Beautiful, I just stepped into week-old gum

At least I'm away from the rummy
But now I'm in for a treat
There's an annoying little bastard child
Kicking me behind the seat

Its times like this I wish
I paid my car loans on time
Now I gotta hear this kid
Bitch, scream, moan, and whine

Now I know that everyone
That rides the bus is not like this
But when judging by the quality on this bus
SOMETHING seems amiss?

That's right, its the old lady
With many a dollar store bag
The bus driver is just ignoring her
I bet her always hears her nag

AT LAST I pull the exit string
And hurry my ass off the bus
Oh Public Transportation
Thanks for scaring us

Because it is you who reminds us
To keep up with those car payments
Or else we'll be waiting in fear
When the bus pulls up to our pavements....